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AN OLD HEAD ON YOUNG SHOULDERS
Matt Stott produces
the trailers that promote upcoming programmes and series on
Travel Channel. When he's away from the edit suite, he has an
almost unhealthy interest in all things golf related and a particular
love of Irish golf courses. He plays off an extremely average
18 handicap, but insists he talks a good game. When left alone
in a room, it's not long before he starts practicing his golf
swing.
 Take a deep breath as you approach this golf course. Imagine playing golf on a giant rock in the middle of the ocean and you're halfway there. You’ll find the Old Head of Kinsale just south of Kinsale Town in County Cork, South West Ireland, on a diamond shaped headland jutting two miles out into the raw Atlantic.
It's no surprise that this course is hugely popular with Americans. The service is more like the Ritz than a golf course. They practically carry you from the cab and deposit you gently in the clubhouse while your bags are whisked away. And as if this wasn’t enough, for the unassuming golfer there’s a helicopter pad.
The promontory itself is an edifice carved by wind and water. It seems pushed for space, but as you get onto it, it opens up considerably and surprisingly extends to 180 acres. There’s even enough room for a decent sized driving range where you can relax the shoulders and start to gauge the wind.
 The recently built clubhouse is perched on top of all this drama and commands superb views of the final holes, the surrounding ocean and the Old Head Lighthouse. There's a decent sized pro shop, offering personalized golf balls, plenty of clothes and paraphernalia emblazoned with the club logo. I have to admit I surrendered to temptation. I bought a hip flask embossed with the 18 holes. (It's now filled with the dangerously drinkable Midleton Irish Whiskey - distilled locally in Cork – the perfect winter pick-me-up.)
The course's logo features the Celtic Stone of Accord, an upright stone with a hole cut through it where Eireann Celts agreed upon a deal by touching their fingers through the hole. Many a visitor from across the Atlantic no doubt laps this up, comparing it to the crowd-pulling Blarney Stone (only an hour's drive away). But Kinsale's actual Stone of Accord has long since vanished into legend and the stone at the golf club, although cut from prehistoric limestone, is not the original. In fact, its age is the subject of intense academic debate. Some believe it dates as far back as 1996. . .
Before you’re allowed to tee-off, the caddy-master delivers his prepared monologue about the course's conception, history and the local wildlife. I would strongly recommend hiring one of the numerous caddies hanging round the practice green; this is a wise investment and will save you both shots and embarrassment.
 The first begins with an open fairway next to the putting green and is less imposing than many of the courses around these parts. (But there’s certainly a 'gallery effect' thanks to the groups waiting to tee-off.) It's a straightforward hole and gives you little sense of what to expect. The second starts to set the scene. This dog-leg par four takes you close to the cliffs and brings the lighthouse into sight.
You have to hold your nerve as there's no shortage of hazards to punish a wayward shot. Don't be afraid of the front nine: they’re fair if you’re driving straight but there’s a danger the spectacular scenery may intimidate you. The fairways are surprisingly wide and offer plenty of safe areas. The greens are also wide and inviting but there’s little forgiveness if YOU are long or wide. Make sure you've packed plenty of balls for this trip.
 My personal favorite is the twelfth. It's a geologist's dream, shouldered by spectacular rock formations, and has the most commanding view. This calls for a very confident drive up and over the cliff face to your right. It’s effectively a blind shot and you're relying on the caddy’s advice (usually given with a wry smile). Once you've climbed the steep hill you’re on a downward narrowing fairway with the green perched high on the rocks. It’s as if you're standing on the train of a wedding dress, and just beyond, there’s the green where the altar would be.
When it comes to green fees, you have to dig deep to play here. A single green fee was €250 when I played in September 2003, so it’s not the sort of place where you choose to play 9 holes and cry off due to a bit of rain. Not that I ever have. The service however, is of such a high standard you’re made to feel like a bit of a star, however you play.
 The Old Head is as spectacular as any golf course in the world and you might feel you need to stand back with hands on hips, like Holbein's Henry VIII, just to take it all in. Words can only convey so much: take a look for yourself, walk its unique terrain, test your skills against the everchanging winds, experience five different kinds of weather in an hour and admire a great ocean and its stunning handiwork. Then, go back to the club-house for a Midleton's and exhale.
The Old Head of Kinsale:
Kinsale Co. Cork Ireland
Tel: (+353) (0)21 477 8444
Website: www.oldheadgolflinks.com/home.htm
Green Fees: Start at £166 per person
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